Wait a minute.
We were told the raid was to get al Qaeda computers? No? No.
The actual target, it turns out, was Qassim al-Rimi. And Fucking Trump missed him. Possibly because he attempted to grab al-Rimi by the pussy, which he does not have so far as we know. The raid, which the Really White House described as a success by any standard, DID succeed in killing Chief Petty Officer William “Ryan” Owens by any standard and an eight-year-old American girl by any standard. But not al-Rimi. By any standard.
So on Sunday, al-Rimi, who apparently does not have a Twitter account, released an audio recording in which he said, “The fool of the White House got slapped at the beginning of his road in your lands.”
The statement came as a guilty pleasure to many of Trump’s critics, until everyone remembered that al-Rimi’s a fucking asshole, too. .