Jubilant Nation Celebrates V-R Day

Pres. Donald Fucking Trump on Tuesday toured and addressed the National Museum of African American History and Culture and then ended racism.

Racism in America is already so over that Pres. Fucking Trump did not need even to mention it once in his fucking remarks about the history of black people in America. He mentioned bigotry, intolerance, hatred, hate, and prejudice once each. Racism, however–the application of those sentiments based on color–was nowhere to be seen. Invisible, one might say. Or novelize.

In fact, racism is so irrelevant now that in discussing what the tour reminded him of regarding what we must do now, the one, specific example Trump gave of a concrete thing that must be addressed was threats against… well, just read it:

“This tour was a meaningful reminder of why we have to fight bigotry, intolerance and hatred in all of its very ugly forms. The anti-Semitic threats targeting our Jewish community and community centers are horrible and are painful, and a very sad reminder of the work that still must be done to root out hate and prejudice and evil.”

Then he thanked Ben Carson. Black guy.

Trump said he is “going to bring this country together,” but gave no details on his plan for together-bringing.

However, it appears that he already has succeeded in eliminating one element of America’s historic racism–discrimination–because at no point in his remarks did Trump mention discrimination, or inequality, both of which used to be things.

The only area in which he suggested he has work to do on behalf of African Americans was his firm commitment not to enslave them again. Like, at all. As Fucking Trump put it, “I pledge to do everything I can to continue that promise of freedom for African Americans,” then adding–because he can not fucking help himself–“and for every American.”

Trump’s achievements in ending racism in American are reflected in the actual policies he is putting in place. For instance, black Americans were once the target of racially motivated violence and terror. No more!

Earlier this month, the Trump Administration was reported to be so successful at ending those centuries of anti-black terror that it is planning to change its Countering Violent Extremism program to focus solely on extremism committed by Muslims, now that white Christians never extreme at black people violently any more.

Although Trump campaigned on the need to talk about “Islamic terrorism” by name, now that he has ended all racially motivated terrorism, he himself no longer has to use the phrase “Islamic terrorism.” Because now that’s redundant. All terrorism is Islamic terrorism. Violence against black people or women or LGBTQ people because they’re black or women or LGBTQ is now just violence. Unless it’s Islamic, of course. Then it’s terrorism.

Already, groups that once tried to reform and rehabilitate potentially violent white supremacists see a time coming when the CVE program will no longer fund their efforts, leaving potentially violent white supremacists to go on their peaceful, non-terrorist, violent, white-supremacist way.

Trump hasn’t just conquered individual racism. Institutional racism is also so extinct that the president has said that the head of the lead agency protecting people of color against discriminatory lending can take a bow and get the fuck out. Fucking Trump even campaigned on a promise to repeal Dodd Frank, the law that actually created the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau.

The CFPB just last month said it planned to ramp up enforcement against racial discrimination on matters such as reverse redlining–when banks don’t open branches in communities of color–higher rates for borrowers of color without regard to their credit scores, and lenders pushing crappy credit packages disproportionately to borrowers of color. The CFPB is apparently no longer needed because those things have stopped now and the only remaining issue is ensuring that America doesn’t make slavery a thing again.

As part of his remarks, Trump indicated that he did not have a chance to tour the entire museum, but that he hopes to return and visit the remaining 3/8 at a later date.

Update: As for anti-Semitism, 70 years after Anne Frank wrote that even Nazis had to be good people deep down, the Anne Frank Center tweeted that it has had it with Trump’s fucking bullshit. Really White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer responded that whatever Jews get is “never good enough” for them. Cuz, y’know, greedy.)