China Counters Trump Masterstroke with Blindingly Obvious Parry

The year-end deadline created by the new Republican tax bill touched off a last-minute scramble among millions of Americans, including China.

The new Republican tax bill caps individual deductions for local taxes in several blue states at $10,000. It also lowers taxes for corporations from a top marginal rate of 35 percent down to kiss my rich ass. Rushing to beat the midnight deadline, China traveled back in time to Jan. 1, 2017, and retroactively lowered its own tax rate to kiss my ostensibly commie ass. Effective one year ago, China’s new, lower corporate tax rate now comes one year before Trump’s future tax cut, which is now one year late. China’s new rate was the result of extensive negotiations at the highest levels of the Chinese government over whether killing Hitler as a baby would make things better or worse.

Four seconds after Trump signed the new U.S. tax rates—which American executives said would let them compete on a level playing field—into law, American executives complained that they were unable to compete in China with American companies unless China’s tax rates created a level playing field with American rates. The new rates ensure that China will now be able to compete with the United States and other low-tax, low-regulation, third-world countries.

American corporations are also scrambling to figure out to figure out how many people they’ll be able to fire thanks to the fleets of new robots their tax windfall will buy.

more: NYTimes