Trump Marks Civil Rights Milestone, Nominates First Living Stereotype of Evil Fucking Douchebag Lawyer To Serve as America’s Civil-Rights Champion

In a watershed moment for the advancement of living stereotypes of evil fucking douchebag lawyers, Pres. Fucking Trump has nominated a living stereotype of an evil fucking douchebag lawyer to head the Justice Department’s Civil Rights Division.

The first-generation Stereotype-American, John Gore, will serve as the deputy assistant attorney general for civil rights, whose responsibilities include ensuring that local officials do not use redistricting to disenfranchise voters. Gore’s experience in this area includes defending local officials who used redistricting to disenfranchise voters.

Gore’s other civil-rights experience includes such actual fucking cases as:

  • Defending the civil rights of R.J. Reynolds to keep $29.85 million in punitive damages
  • Defending toymakers‘ civil right to sell the “Rock ‘n Play” sleeper even with a propensity to rock ‘n develop mold
  • Defending the civil rights of pharmacists to stop states from importing cheaper drugs
In a statement Gore would totally fucking bankrupt us and all our progeny in perpetuity for attributing to him, he absolutely in no way said or should be construed to have said, implied, or indicated exclusively to The Fucking News, “As the first living stereotype of an evil fucking douchebag lawyer in my family to shatter the douchebag ceiling, I just want to say to my parents that I plan to sue them on behalf of whatever corporate client wants me to. Love you guys!”
more: Slate, Hill